Alright, friends. The time has come. You can release the horses you’ve been holding, salvage teeth enamel from the bits you’ve been chomping, and abandon your seat’s edge to use the whole of it to sit, because yes. The makeup glasses were delivered. For those of you who were spared the suffocation that comes with seven days of bated breath, I’ll recap. Last week I discussed my very limited vision and how it hinders eye makeup application. If I want to eyeline or mass-scare (the act of applying mascara)(or I suppose scaring the masses) I have to have my contacts in. Without... Read More

I’ve been a four eyes since the 2nd grade. Evidently binge reading plus optically challenged genetics equals functional blindness. It’s a formula that holds true to this day. My first pair of glasses had comically large pink plastic frames, because why wouldn’t they. It was like I was trying to earn another merit badge in dorkdom. High waters? Check. Preference for books over human interaction? Check. Thick corrective lenses that if swiped off my face rendered me helpless? Aww yeah. Because of this, I only wear makeup and glasses simultaneously if I’ve already done my makeup... Read More