It was a typical Saturday. I grabbed a little coffee, got comfortable on the couch, put some sports on the television, and scrolled Instagram reels on my phone.

The house could have used a decent cleaning, the yard begged to be mowed, and the grocery list wasn’t shopping for itself, but the day was packed full of sports.

Credit via BBC

In the French Open, top-seeded Aryna Sabalenka and 21-year-old Coco Gauff were already in the second set. At lunchtime, the New York Yankees were due to face the Boston Red Sox. And at the Belmont Stakes, the third leg of horse racing’s triple crown, Sovereignty and Journalism would write their final chapter around 4:30p.

“Are you going to sit there all day?” My wife asked.

I understood her confusion.

If you don’t follow women’s tennis, you may not understand that the French Open at Roland Garos is one of the four majors, or major tournaments. My wife probably just assumed that I was blowing her off watching the MSC Hamburg Ladies Open or something similar.

It makes sense. Go to the gym at noon on a workday, and the mounted televisions will be airing the Visit Knoxville Open of the Korn Ferry Golf Tour, the American Cornhole Regionals, or the Veolia Atlanta Pickleball Championships.

If I’m watching my favorite pro or college team play football, no one is expecting me to hit the Farmer’s Market or wander through Super Target with a long honey-do list. But what if it’s the Michigan Panthers versus Birmingham Stallions in the USFL, the XFL Championship Game with the Renegades versus the Defenders, or the Oregon Lightning in a tough matchup versus the Corpus Christi Titans in the Arena League.

Can we even recognize the difference between a quality sporting contest and questionable sporting content anymore?

Saturday’s time on the couch was the perfect case study to figure it all out.

• As Gauff was defeating Sabalenka on TNT, FOX was televising the NASCAR Craftsman Truck Series – The DQS Solutions & Staffing 200. I don’t mean to hate on FOX or their viewership, but trucks driving around a track 200 times is NASCAR, not NASA, and probably more content than a contest.

Credit via Speedway Digest

A NASCAR truck race on the FOX Network sponsored by a power tool company, trying to find solutions for inadequate DQS and Staffs. NASCAR should call it The Compensation 200.

• On CBS that morning, the network was televising NWSL Soccer – The Kansas City Current at NJ/NY Gotham FC – Holy Snoozers Batman!

And please don’t call me sexist for dissing the National Women’s Soccer League. Unless it’s the World Cup, soccer is boring no matter the gender.

For me, it’s always stoppage time.

• If you do love the NWSL, the league aired matches throughout the day on the ION Channel. The Portland Thorns FC vs Bay FC, Chicago Stars FC vs Angel City FC. Totally thought that the ION Channel was in Spanish, but all bueno.

• Not to be outdone, ABC was airing the Premier League. One could argue that every game that includes Manchester United, Arsenal, or Chelsea are quality contests. But this was the Premier Lacrosse League: Utah Archers vs Boston Cannons.

Premier, as in, the first time I had ever heard of this league.

• After the NWSL game, CBS switched to PGA Tour Golf and gave us the third round of the RBC Canadian Open. Golf is like tennis. Only the majors are of any importance, and if Scottie Scheffler isn’t playing, RBC stands for Really Boring Content.

• ESPN aired the College Baseball World Series all day long. But why would I want to waste my time watching amateurs play baseball – when I already have the Colorado Rockies.

Credit via Wikipedia

• ABC moved on to the WNBA around 1pm as the Las Vegas Aces matched up against the league’s new expansion team, the Golden State Valkyries. But let’s be real. Wouldn’t the Golden State Gal Curry’s have more commercial appeal.

These are talented basketball players that are important to many, but unless Caitlin Clark is playing, I’d rather watch less Valkyries on ABC, and more Val Kilmer’s on some other channel – Top Gun, Real Genius, or The Saint.

• Back on FOX, the New York Yankees (39-24) hosted the Boston Red Sox (31-35). The Red Sox traded Babe Ruth to New York in 1919, and the two teams have been bitter rivals ever since. If you are from New York or Boston, this game is more than just a contest. It’s everything. But if you’re anyone else, it’s only game 63 of 162. It’s called America’s Pastime, because baseball is just something to watch to pass the time.

Credit via USA Today

• Over on ABC, the horses were getting ready for the 157th running of the Belmont. The Belmont is the third leg of horse racing’s triple crown (Kentucky Derby, Preakness, and Belmont) and thus is automatically a quality sporting contest of the highest degree.

The four hours of pre-race coverage – that’s content.

• CBS thought they were airing the WNBA game of the season as Caitlin Clark and the Indiana Fever would take on the Angel Reese and the Chicago Sky in what would be Must-See-TV.

But Caitlin Clark wouldn’t play due to injury, so it’s Must-Miss-for-me.

• And at 5pm, ESPN2 had the Banana Ball World Tour: The Party Animals vs Savannah Bananas. But why would I watch a goofy team play comedic baseball – when I already have the Colorado Rockies?

But what is going on?

Are sports now a choice between AVP Beach Volleyball, the ShopRite LPGA Classic, and Futbol Masculino Amistosos Internacionales? Am I supposed to believe that the PPA (Professional Pickleball Association), AUSL (Athletes Unlimited Softball League), and the PDC (Professional Darts Corporation), are worth betting a parlay on?

The Networks are such idiots. You can’t just throw endless amounts of content at us and think we will scroll through it aimlessly until we are entertained.

Bored and frustrated, I turned off the television following the Men’s International Soccer Friendlies on TNT and scrolled Instagram reels deep into the night.

Images via Steam, BBC, Speedway Digest, Wikipedia, USA Today

Alan Tapley The Athletic Supporter

Alan Tapley is an educator, author, and blogger who has lived just outside of Boulder for the last twenty years.  His published work includes two novels, two children’s books, a series of cartoons in the Minneapolis Star-Tribune, and multiple sports related articles. His love for family and the state of Colorado is only matched by one thing, his passion for sports.  The first baseball game he ever attended was at Wrigley Field, before there were lights.  At the final Bronco game at the old Mile High, he allegedly cut out a piece of his seat in the South stands.  But regardless of being here for the Avalanche’s last Stanley Cup, the Rockies only World Series appearance, and all the Broncos’ Super Bowl Victories, his wife never fails to remind him that he wasn’t at the University of Colorado in 1990, like she was.  The year the Buffs football team won the National Championship