April in Colorado.

It’s when the ski resorts close and the snow finally comes.

It’s seeing your favorite team at Coors Field and watching the Rockies, too.

It’s McIlroy at the Masters and Deion at the Spring game.

It’s playoff hockey, playoff basketball, and the Frozen Four.

And it’s the anticipation of possibly the biggest day of the month, Draft Day.

• To clarify, I was referring to the NFL Draft (April 23-25), and not the WNBA Draft that apparently happened on Monday.

Hopefully, everyone read my WNBA Mock Draft, where I mocked the draft for being on a random Monday and then guessed that the first ten selections were either tall ladies from UConn or UCLA.

Let’s look at the schedule, WNBA Draft. We have The Masters, the Frozen Four, the NBA Playoffs, NHL Hockey, and the NFL Draft. We can fit you in on Monday, April 13th. Right after the European Pickleball Championships. How’s that work for you?

Credit via Sportico.com

Azzi Fudd is nice, but without JuJu, you’ve got no juju.

• To be honest, I haven’t paid much attention to the NFL Draft since the Denver Broncos don’t have a pick until number 62 of the second round. Talk about Mr. Irrelevant.

Credit via CBS Sports

The Broncos’ biggest need looks to be at tight end, where Oregon’s Kenyon Sadiq is turning heads due to his 4.39 speed. But the only way Sadiq drops all the way to 62 is if he changes his name to Shedeur.

Denver could also use more help at running back. With his injury history, J.K. Dobbins is on the shelf more than J.K. Rowling.

At pick 62, we’re not expecting a Jeremiyah Love to be around, but a Jeremiyah Like would be nice.

Quarterback Fernando Mendoza will undoubtedly be going number one to the Las Vegas Raiders. The Mendoza Line used to be baseball vernacular for a .200 batting average, or true sucking. But if the Raiders don’t improve Mendoza’s Line (the offensive line), that .200 is going to represent their winning percentage.

Credit via Instagram

The only other drama of the NFL Draft is trying to project where Alabama quarterback Ty Simpson ends up.

Simpson plans on attending the NFL draft in person, but I’d suggest he bring a seat cushion, because he’s going to be there a while.

I’m no scout, but I’d stay away from Ty Simpson like he was OJ Simpson. The guy’s a bloody mess.

• Speaking of bloody mess, did you see that drive that Rory McIlroy hit into the trees on 18 with a chance to win the Masters?

I haven’t seen a drive that bad since Tiger’s last DUI.

The difference between a professional and an amateur is fairly obvious. If McIlroy hits a ball into the trees, he salvages a bogey and wins the Masters. If I hit a ball into the trees, I come out with a used Titleist, two dirty Callaways, and a nine on my scorecard.

Credit via Sports Illustrated

As for Bryson DeChambeau. His game after playing in the Saudi Arabian-backed LIV tour has declined so badly that he now needs to get out of the sand both literally and figuratively.

• As Tiger celebrates with DUIs, I’m celebrating those DU guys. Congrats on winning the NCAA Frozen Four.

Credit via Instagram

I’ll take mine on ice!

• Sticking with hockey, the Colorado Avalanche start their playoff run on Saturday after wrapping up the most points in all of hockey with 116.

Many think that the President’s Trophy is a recipe for disaster, but I think Melania’s press conference proved otherwise.

• Speaking of disasters. The NBA finished its season with 8 teams losing more than 55 games due to tanking.

The tanking was so prevalent that the NBA added Clorox Ultra Clean Toilet Tablets as an official sponsor at the All-Star break.

The Sacramento Kings (22-60) became so proficient with tanking that they decided to bring back head coach Doug Christie to get a head start on tanking for next season.

Adam Silver has suggested a few plans to eliminate the issue, but I think I have a solution.

Tank away, but the following season, your team name is turned into something inappropriate. The Brooklyn Nuts, the Chicago Balls, the Utah Jizz…

• Next up is the NBA Playoffs, starting with the Play-In Tournament.

I’m excited to watch the Play-In, as I really think the Phoenix Suns, Portland Trail Blazers, or LA Clippers could challenge some of the better teams and make a deep playoff run. Just play in’.

I like our chances, but is it the Denver Nuggets or the denver Nuggets? Because I see very little D out there.

• Hard to believe that just a few years ago, I was sitting in the snow, paying to watch the CU Spring game. Three years later, it no longer snows, and you couldn’t pay me to watch.

Credit via SwagHer Magazine

Remember when Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, Lil Wayne, and the Wu-Tang Clan used to frequent the sidelines. I feel like the only celebrity that’ll be on the sidelines this season is Deion.

“Prime Time” used to mean must-see TV. Now it seems to refer to Amazon and how quickly a decent product can be delivered.

• I do have to make a formal apology to Dick Monfort and the Rockies organization for blasting them after just four games. After selling 40% of the team to the Walton-Penner Ownership Group last week, the team is still only 6-10, but it feels like they are at least 40% better.

April showers.

The DU Pioneers took home the gold.

The Avs and Nuggets are going for gold.

And at Folsom, they cheer for the black and gold.

A Golden Shower, if you will.

Wait, that doesn’t sound right.

Images via eBay, SwagHer Magazine, Sports Illustrated, Instagram, Sportico.com, CBS Sports

Alan Tapley Colorado Sports & Culture Writer

Alan Tapley is an educator, author, and blogger who has lived just outside of Boulder for the last twenty years. His published work includes two novels, two children’s books, a series of cartoons in the Minneapolis Star-Tribune, and multiple sports related articles. His love for family and the state of Colorado is only matched by one thing, his passion for sports.  The first baseball game he ever attended was at Wrigley Field, before there were lights.  At the final Bronco game at the old Mile High, he allegedly cut out a piece of his seat in the South stands.  But regardless of being here for the Avalanche’s last Stanley Cup, the Rockies only World Series appearance, and all the Broncos’ Super Bowl Victories, his wife never fails to remind him that he wasn’t at the University of Colorado in 1990, like she was.  The year the Buffs football team won the National Championship